beginners survival guide to home educating.

Like most people who begin home educating I started with big dreams, I would be able to concentrate on both children, target what they struggle with them and make it so much fun, we would fit in four separate lessons, I will teach and learn Spanish at the same time, be able to do P.E and sports but not the boring ones the fun things they want to do to keep them active and be able to do arts and crafts projects and groups they can go to for interaction with other children.

Before I knew it I was constantly surrounded by random papers, project forgotten about, trying to prep lessons late, and being so exhausted the next day, I couldn’t think, don’t even get me started on trying to also fit in cooking cleaning washing and general housework.

I felt like a total failure I had bitten off more than I could chew, and we all wound up unhappy from it, the kids were always rushing from one thing to another, getting stuck on things so one lesson would cut into the next one, I was starting to lose my patience and bit by bit my sanity.

Which I am sure during this pandemic lots of other parents/guardians are going through the same thing, my first suggestions is relax, your going to run yourself and your child/ children out, take a week off, which I know may seem like a loss of time but trust me here you need it and so does your child/children.

Do fewer lessons during the day focus on two main topics and then at least one fun one, I recommend maths and English and alternate science. Also, every opportunity is a learning opportunity, they go to the park and see a family of swans teach them about habitats, how chicks hatch, how swans grow.

You go to the shops to buy food, hello fun maths lesson, money management, you to the art gallery they have a favorite art piece, that can be art history and English.

Be kind to yourself, even though it may take weeks for them to be able to understand that one problem in maths or English, no teacher would have the amount of time dedicated to just one child as you are doing now and when they finally get it there are few things that feel as good as their pride and yours at the hard work you dedicated to it.

30th Jun 2020 0

How i plan to manage the lows.

My feeling’s at the moment is filled with such lows and highs and it is hard for me to make sense of them due to how much I need to be able to manage in my life, between anxiety, depression, and pain its hard for me to understand what feelings are real or not.

I keep going through these huge highs and lows, one minute I’m so excited about taking control of my life and making a change for the better, the future seems exciting in a way they haven’t been for a long time.

Then suddenly doubt kicks in, how can someone like me manage, I have failed so many times before how is this time any different from every other time I get all excited but then can’t stick to things. Before I know it I’m on the brink of a panic attack trying to figure out how I got to this point in the first place and is it already too late for me.

Just to clarify I am 28 and hope I have a lot more time left in me and is it ever too late to change anything, so I have a feeling the change in my food isn’t going to be the difficult part, changing my thought are the hard thing but again I’m already making excuses.

I can’t imagine ever living without anxiety, depression, and self-doubt, can a person ever truly change the way they think. I have tried to read about this, and there is a metaphor that is commonly used as the big black dog, that it is always with you, some days its bigger, some days its smaller but it is always there. so is that it for me, sentenced to live the rest of my life walking this imaginary dog that I never wanted in the first place.

So this process is going to take more than a change of food and extra exercise, I have to try and learn a whole new way of thinking, maybe invest in a dog training program because I will gain control one way or another if I cant get rid I will have to find a way to change it from a Great Dane to a Chiwawa.

At this moment though i am just going to enjoy it, try to stop worrying about the next hurdle, and try to find a way to really just embrace the good, everytime I feel doubt or saddness i am going to concentrate on a moment that made me truely happy.

Like yesterday for example yesterday there was a moment I in the kitchen with my wonderful fiance, I could hear my children playing happily behind me, and my baby in my arms cooing and playing, all I could think was I wish this moment would last forever, I felt my true happiness.

I am going to write these moments so, at times when I am feeling lost or defeated it will remind me that the feeling is only temporary, I have gotten through this before I will again, I am stronger than I think, and hopefully, this will remind me.

29th Jun 2020 0

Is there ever enough time in a day…

So yesterday was a lot of fun, we managed to get to the park, even got my 10,000 steps in, spent a good amount of time together playing and even made a huge dent in decorating our D.I.Y barbie house (a well crafted, well decorated box).

That was when a new problem came up, is there ever enough hours in a day, after managing all the fun things i wanted to do, looming over me was all the grown up things i have to do.

Teaching, cleaning, cooking and sorting and don’t even get me started on bathing. Before i knew it its late and I’m still having to do things, there was so much that needed doing i decided to save it for today instead and get a decent rest.

There needs to be some sort of balance, if i am always saving things for tomorrow, will it ever come, my bedroom will be the dumping ground for all and no one wants that.

I am proud of yesterdays achievements but there has to be an easier way surely, stream lining, cut out all wasted time, work faster but surely putting more pressure on myself to do more and more is going to make me burn out, or yet again quit.

Today i am devising a plan to divide and conquer, it is only in the beginning stage so today will be a chaotic mess, but i have managed to get the children to at least say they will co-operate with the promise of if we all work as a team on the little things surely there will be more time for fun big things.

I will smooth out the rough edges to get it as organised as i can whilst trying to stick to yesterdays enthusiasm for a month, if it doesn’t, back to the drawing board and see what else needs to be changed, but one thing i know for sure i am not going back to how things were.

So day two of trying to transform my life i am feeling a bit sore, pretty sure my knees have decided to begin a revolution against the rest of my body, im really tired, but i am still feeling optimistic, proud and excited, I can feel that this time is different, there is a new energy in the air and it makes me excited for the future.

25th Jun 2020 0

Today is the restart of the rest of life…

So I’ve decided that today is going to be the big day, I’m not living like this any more.

All I have been thinking of is the negatives and how hard it is for things to change, and I have realised I have been preparing for this change for years and suprise suprise years later I’m still preparing.

I am not expecting a miracle, years of eating to much, and not exercising enough and never really figuring out how to manage time is not going to change over night but if I carry on the way I am going it’s never going to begin.

I always use excuses why I can’t start, I’m in to much pain, I’m to tired, I don’t have enough time.

I’m 28 years old and scared of not being able to play with my children by 30, that’s the joys of being a disabled mum, you only have so many spoons (energy for those of you not in the lingo).

I am scared not ready, sore and tired but for some reason never felt so inspired, so this is my accountabuddy, the thing that makes me feel like I can’t quit.

I live in the past or the future always worrying about who I could have been who I will be so instead I am going to concentrate on who I am now.

So here it goes no turning back anymore this post is not the first post I wanted, the one I spent months preparing for, waiting for the right moment, this is the one I am doing now, no excuses, a messy beginning but it’s my now.

For myself, for my children the start begins now.

24th Jun 2020 0

The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

1st Jun 2020 0